


Roommate of my imagination

by FawnedofPines, n33ks



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe - College/University, Crack, Human Bill Cipher, M/M, innuendos
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-10
Updated: 2018-07-10
Packaged: 2019-06-08 06:14:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 722
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15237192
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FawnedofPines/pseuds/FawnedofPines, https://archiveofourown.org/users/n33ks/pseuds/n33ks
Summary: College is around the corner and it's time for people to settle into their new dorms. Dipper Pines get assigned to be roommates with one of the supposedly hottest guys in school. He doesn't know what to expect, but he knows that it was certainly not this.This was intentionally written bad please don't sue us.





	Roommate of my imagination

**Author's Note:**

> Wow hey my first fanfiction that im posting and it's a really bad crack fic from 2017 :'D Iris and i both wrote this in a call one night at 3am. We used a word generator for the theme and title. Hope you enjoy! I swear im a better writer :')  
> Contains swearing and dick jokes

Fuck

THAT MAN

I hit my head on the headboard of my wooden framed bed as I awoke from a nightmare. I checked the time.

4:20 pm.

Damn I overslept... again...

I'm starting college in a week, I shouldnt be sleeping in this late... and pulling all nighters any other night doing nerdy things that you dont wanna know about. Aside from that, Im supposed to have an assigned roomate living with me soon. And I dont know WHEN THE FUCK HE WOULD GET HERE. I remember him texting me saying he'd be here around 4:30 but he never specified a date. I dont know if he means today or tomorrow or yESTERDAY. I glanced at the time again

4:25 pm.

Well if it is today then I dont have enough time for a shower. I dont have enough time to clean up ANYTHING. Boxes are still scattered around in places that you can trip over them, my bed is a huge fucking mess with the covers sprawled everywhere, iM A HUGE FUCKING MESS WITH CLOTHES JUST BARELY SLIPPING OFF OF ME. You get the point.

I dont know whether this guy is a neat freak or a huge mess like I am. All I know is his name and his phone number because that's what the college gave to me. (Welcome to college where nobody really gives a shit about privacy.) His name is apparently Bill, and from what he texted me he has long blonde and brown hair, pale skin, and scars everywhere from kitchen utensils. He shouldnt be that hard to notice. I glance at the cock again.

4:28 pm

Should be here any minute now. Should I get up and unlock the door? Nah, the head admin wouldve given him a key. I shouldnt worry about that hah. Also if I stand up my pants would probably fall down due to them becoming unbuckled in my sleep...somehow...uhh.. My mind goes back to Bill.

I can only imagine how hot he is. His wavy blonde hair, golden muscles vibrating under his shirt as he laughs at thin air in my mind.

Wait what.

Im supposed to be straight.

Arent I?

I hear a faint knocking on my door, I get up to see who is there but I loose my footing and trip over a box full of uhh... toys you can say... and my head goes inside an empty box right beside it. I groan. And then, I hear it.

The sound of a key unlocking the very same door.

The door opened and I could barely see the light shining through the box.

“Are you alright??” Says a honeyed sounding voice from what I can assume is the doorway.

“YEAH! Yeah yeah haha.. I'm okay.. Dont worry about me, just extreemely tried.” I scramble around to sit up but I still have the carboard box on my head.

The person chuckles and shuts the door. I can hear them walk towards me. They take the stupid brown box off my head, and reveals a pale youthful face looking down at me with these enticing golden eyes and an attracive smirk on their face.

“Are you Di-,,, diaper? Diaper Pines??”

“Unfortunately yes. And eXCUSE YOU IT'S _SIPPER PENIS_.”

The stranger gave a confused laugh, “Are you sure?? Who would have penis in their name??”

“Uh fuck, sorry, I mean Dipper Pines. And me aparently.” I feel blood rush to my cheeks in emBAREASSment.

“I thought so, I'm Bill Dicsipper.” He grins wildly. Did he just fucking do that on purpose? DOES HE THINK THIS IS A FUCKING GAE? By the shit eating grin on his face, probably.

“... Bill Dicsipper, aey? Hey, I'm a dick. Wanna taste me? If you're truly a dicsipper.” I grin back at him. Let's see how far I'll go with this.

“FINE FINE, It's Bill Cipher.... Though I wouldnt mind a taste at all.” That fucker decides to wink at me, and keeps the stupid grin on his face.

“Fuck. I didnt think I'd get this far.” I whisper under my breath, getting flustered.

“What?”

“Uh, nothing.” I worriedly smile.

Bill holds out his hand and helps me stand up. 

He stared into my eyes as he pulls his dick out. What the Fuck was I getting into?

**Author's Note:**

> Help us  
> We're not gonna be continuing this but the idea was that Dipper passed out after he hit his head and started imagining what would happen. The real Bill comes in to find him on the floor still asleep but then backs out of the room with a lot of concern.
> 
> Im currently working on other fanfics for Miraculous and Gravity Falls, if you decide to stick around! Thanks for reading :'D


End file.
